My dad was a working “functional alcoholic,” but my mother was a believer in Jesus Christ. Though living with my father was tough, God provided my wonderful godly mother to take my brother and me to church and to live the good example before us. .
At the age of 10 in a church service I heard my beloved pastor ask, “Do you know you are a sinner in need of a Savior?” I walked down the aisle that day and accepted Christ as my Savior. I knew I had lived a bad life and needed God’s help, and Jesus Christ His only son provided the only answer and the help I needed.
As a young adult I strayed away from God and a church home. I lived many unhappy empty years trying to fill that emptiness with all the worldly things that never last or fulfill. Finally in the year1997 my husband and I started attending a wonderful church home, First Baptist North Spartanburg. I have spent much time studying God’s life manual, the BIBLE, and now have a joy and peace that can only come from having a personal relationship with Christ. God has seen our family through many diificult times-sickness,marital issues ,financial struggles. We feel His prescence and know He has wonderful plans for us. I KNOW I WILL NEVER BE ALONE AGAIN.
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I grew up under some difficult circumstances.It was fun when I was small but as I got older things got scarey. My parents started having marital problems and divorced when I was in 5th grade or maybe younger. Mom kept things together by working a lot, and my brother and sisters and I took advantage of that. By the time I was 15 I got into drugs, alcohol and skipping school. I didn’t know how to speak up for myself. so I followed the crowd.I was the skinny boyish girl with two younger sisters who were always called cute.So I did whatever to get attention. I thought I had to have a boyfriend and was mistreated by them. By age 24 I was living with a guy and got pregnant, so I married him. By age 27 I knew I wanted a change - what it was I didn’t know. I wanted to keep my family together and teach my children the right way to go.
I was home one night with just my children and me - my husband was out with his friends. I put the children to bed, went to my bedroom and started watching t.v. I saw Billy Graham on, so I watched. I don’t remember every word, but that night my life was changed.What he talked about helped me to understand that I do things that are wrong according to God. I’m a sinner. I understood that Jesus died for my sins,was buried,but came back to life. I understood that I had to admit that I’m a sinner, had to ask God to forgive me and believe Jesus died for me. I had to ask Him into my heart, my life.
It was that simple.I prayed, believed and my life was changed.Istill have struggles but because I have faith in Jesus, I have hope and direction. I have been able to help my children understand Gods’ love. Drugs and alcohol are not a part of my life or my husband’s. My family is together. When I find myself comparing to others I know that all I have to do is LIVE FOR GOD. God is my hope- power-strength-direction-peace. He will and wants to change your life.
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As a youngster we had many trials in our family. My younger brother was born with a rare form of eye cancer. He was always called the miracle baby because out of the 12 cases 9 died, 2 were blind and he survived with his sight. My older brother was always in trouble and eventually committed suicide while in prison. I was taken to church every Sunday by my Christian mother. My father refused to go and still does to this day.
I accepted Christ when I was nine years old. It was at a mission church from Kempsville Meadows Baptist Church in Virginia Beach, Va. I remember standing in the worship service during the invitation and the next thing I remember I was up with the pastor telling him I was a sinner in need of a Savior. I believe I was saved at this time but it was more head knowledge than heart knowledge.
I continued being faithful until I reached age 15. Then I started to rebel against everything including God. God protected me during those years for a reason even though I did STUPID things. I became a very hard and calloused person, not loving anything or anybody including myself. I finished school, got married, had a child and was on a fast career track. This was when God started working, although I was not aware of it at the time. My wife and I were headed for a separation when a job offer came that was not in the fast track. We moved to Enoree SC from Raleigh NC. We started back to church and I made the statement that I would go to preaching but not all that other stuff! If we had not made this move, I am sure we would have been divorced. This was the hand of God working in my life. The greatest miracle occurred later however. God started to work on my heart and changed it from cold and hard to one filled with love. This was a dramatic night and day difference. I began to have a real relationship with Jesus based on my heart condition. I began to understand why God saved and protected me all that time I was rebelling; it was to show and tell others about Jesus. I want everyone to have what I have in Jesus.
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When I was younger, I was self-centered; just interested in enjoying life. I had a wild - tough nature. Basically, if it felt good…I did it. I thought I had total control of my life. I smoked, drank, and got involved in other careless activities through the time I was a young adult. I had been in and out of church most of my life but didn’t feel any presence of God or security about my future. As a young adult, several painful and frightening experiences helped me see what I was doing to myself - wasting my life. Facing this reality, I started trying to get myself going in the right direction. The part of me that showed on the outside - got better…gradually.
Happy marriage, church attendance, good job . . . even with all of these, I was sinking, … afraid of going to hell and able to do nothing about it. Years of struggling passed – with no solution - with me trying harder all the time. Bored one Sunday in church, I was reading along in the New Testament (Ephesians 2), and it finally became clear that it was not that I wasn’t trying hard enough … it was that I couldn’t try hard enough. The answer was God’s grace - something He did; not something I could do. I prayed a simple prayer of acceptance thanking God for his grace in the form of His Son Jesus Christ. That was when God saved me.
After all those years of wondering if I would ever earn or be worthy of eternal life, and the peace that goes with it, all I had to do was accept it by faith. From that time forward, I began working to develop a relationship with Jesus Christ. Since becoming a Christian, life hasn’t been perfect or even easy. I am still an imperfect person. I have troubles just like anyone else. But I am different; more sensitive and caring- really concerned about other people. I have found that spiritual peace and security I was looking for. I know that I am not struggling alone. Life continues to be a journey, but Christ is with me as I make my way.
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